satoruvash

The blogger Nessa, recently made a post about colours titled: The most perfect colour. This is an excerpt from one of my responses.

Just to give you an idea of how much I like colours . . . my favourite clothes, regular objects, or furniture are either black or white. My favourite wall paint? Dark grey. If you are looking for a colour explosion, just visit my blog and observe the layout and banner–or my avatar for that matter.

Just to note in case my preferences dramatically change, the tone of the quote is meant to be ironic and sarcastic.

Nessa adores colours. She posted two links to illustrate her choice of art. I am reciprocating with a personal favourite called “Invader” by Eireen on Deviant Art. It is an example of my personal artistic aesthetic, representing what I consider to be acceptable colour levels. Surprisingly, it is under the Macabre and Horror category. Perhaps it is my science fiction fascination, but I see plenty of beauty and little in the way of horror and macabre. Granted, this is coming from someone who considers the fusion of human and machine as the next desirable and logical step in evolution.

Regardless, enjoy.

In my previous entry titled “How many phobias can YOU get from reading the Bible?” I blogged about phobias. This entry is more personal. I suffer from Photophobia, which is not a phobia in the usual sense.

Most phobias are abnormal, excessive, and irrational, whereas Photophobia is usually an appropriately rational response. According to the Oxford concise Colour Medical Dictionary, it is “an abnormal intolerance of light, in which exposure to light produces intense discomfort of the eyes with tight contraction of the eyelids and other reactions aimed at avoiding the light.”

Photophobia:
Eye pain in bright sunlight, incandescent and fluorescent light.

Contrast between an object and its background is reduced, stopping you from properly seeing what you are looking at.

One example of this type of glare visibility is when bright headlights from an incoming car can stop you from seeing the road. Another, is when sunlight shines on a TV and the contrast of the picture diminishes or disappears. The second example is rather benign. However, the second illustrates the potential dangers in public places. In a domestic setting, a sudden increase in brightness when dicing vegetables can have dire consequences.

Headaches may also result from light sensitivity. The discomfort can be reduced by avoiding sunlight, closing the eyes, wearing dark sunglasses with UV protection, and darkening a room–such as by closing blinds or drawing curtains. It is also helpful to shield light sources to prevent direct light from entering the eyes, as well as minimizing glare from paper, texts, blackboards and desktops. In the most severe cases, dark sunglasses must be worn indoors.

Causes:
Those with light-coloured eyes, cataracts and migraine headaches are most likely to notice the sensitivity. It can also be a symptom of albinism, red-green colour blindness, mercury-poisoning, contact lenses, and certain drugs like amphetamines and antihistamines, cannabis, and cocaine.

I once had my sunglasses stolen in a lecture theatre during a particularly sunny day–most likely the primary motivation, the secondary one being that they were a very nice pair. In all, the theft was a very unpleasant experience. The stolen item was not at all easy to replace given that the density of the tint was greater than one would find in regular stores. To complicate matters, the place where I had bought them was out of stock.

I currently live in a very sunny city. It is obviously unwise given the severity of my condition and I intend to move as soon as the opportunity arises. Unless I want to pass out on the street, I cannot go outside without sunglasses. When I venture out, I seek shade whenever possible either by standing under a tree, or by hiding in the shadow of buildings or choosing to walk on the shady part of the street.

At home, all my windows have coverings. My monitor is dimmed and when typing blog entries, comments, or general surfing, I need to periodically give my eyes a rest or they begin to burn and the words glow until they are no longer legible. In buildings with bright fluorescent lights, I need to wear sunglasses unless I want animate and/or inanimate objects to seem as if they are phasing in and out of this dimension, and as a result, risk crashing into them.

Suffice it to say, it affects concentration, which depending on the situation, can be a serious inconvenience. Given the choice of going out at night or during the day, I choose the former every time. It is not surprising then, that all but one of my romantic partners were nocturnal. As a natural consequence, I first met them at night or during the day hiding from the sun.

Considering all but one (Pantheist) of my ex’s were Atheists/Agnostics, I suspect my next romantic partner will be either of the three and nocturnal.

People of ambiguous gender are attractive. If ambiguity persists after second, third, and more glances, the greater the attraction. If gender cannot be precisely determined at close range even after listening to the individual’s voice . . . there are no words to describe this level of appeal.

Outside the home, my only focus is in getting to my destination. I do not notice faces. People only grab my attention if they are about to crash into me. I use my quick reflexes to slide out of the way, only seeing them as objects to avoid.

I know my particular tastes and preferences very well. Rarely do they intersect with mainstream concepts of beauty and desire, leading to my ignoring most of the world and those who comprise it.

Yet yesterday, my subconscious compels me to stop mid stride.

Something and/or someone behind me matches my criteria and with a great deal of accuracy or else my subconscious would see no reason to shake my conscious mind alert.

Moving targets disappear from line of vision faster. I turn around and perform a quick people scan.

Nothing.

I move on to objects beginning with the largest ones.

The inside of this particular mall is littered with enormous, generic, store displays. The one on the right and nearest me, is a clear example, and my eyes pass it almost instantly.

Further ahead is another photograph [directly above].

Now this, I think, must be the cause.

Question: Male or female?

I tend to stay away from personality/relationship tests because when loosely scrutinized, the holes are incredibly obvious. The only personality test that I have ever been impressed with is the Keirsey Temperament Sorter which I believe has a more objective approach than the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator.

There is plenty of talk about Valentine’s Day (February 14th) in the blogosphere. I am indifferent at best to the holiday, preferring instead Halloween–which as far as holidays are concerned epitomizes romance the most. Regardless, the blogger Nessa has an entry with her responses to this Valentine’s Day relationship survey.

Now, the link above takes you to a page that asks you for your Age, Sex, Relationship status, and Length of that relationship. I can see how age can play a factor in the responses from a teenager versus someone in their 20s or 50s. I took the test once as either gender and both the questions and my results were the same. The ’sex’ drop down box is only relevant then for the purpose of determining which gender is taking the test the most. Unfortunately, I do not believe the average person is going to look at that sex option and view it that way.

The questions are generally gender neutral. The only two questions I had problems with were 7 and 14. Number 7 asks what you consider to be the perfect ‘date’ movie and number 14 asks you which of the available songs you would play in a ‘romantic situation.’ The choices are incredibly stereotypical.

They illustrate in their simplicity society’s penchant for dividing ‘normal’ time with ‘romantic’ time and one of the major reasons many relationships fail. With the exception of pornography, there is no valid reason for making a distinction between movies to see solely with friends and movies to see solely with significant others. It implies that your significant other is not someone you can be ‘buddies’ with.

There is also the fact that romance is seen as an ‘emotion’ and not a state or awareness. Since emotions vary throughout the day then, if romance is an emotion, it must be generated anew by ’setting the mood’ causing unnecessary work and stress on participants. This is a backward approach, with an extended emphasis on the effect instead of the cause. The most romantic experiences I have ever had were intellectually and creatively rich foremost. When the effects on the mind are so visceral, deep emotions are a natural progression.

At any rate, the purpose of the questions is to calibrate your ‘relationship style.’ I have bolded blue what does not apply to me. However, the results are for the most part quite accurate. Here they are:

You have a Consumate relationship style

You have a “total relationship” with your partner that comprises all aspects of love. Your relationship is very passionate and romantic, you have a great deal of intimacy and are able to share every feeling and idea with your partner, and, what’s more, you are genuinely committed to this relationship in the long run. This is the kind of relationship that most people would only dream of having. You must be very happy… Congratulations!

AND YOUR BIG 5 PERSONALITY TRAITS ARE

You are very calm, relaxed, and confident. It really takes a lot to stress you out and you rarely act on the basis of negative emotions (e.g. , hate, disgust, or anger). You enjoy working under pressure and find that, compared to you, most people worry about pointless things and are not capable of handling pressure that well. You are not very moody or easily upset.

You are introverted, quiet and reserved. You enjoy being on your own and prefer to avoid loud and crowded parties. You don’t really like meeting new people much and have few but good friends who you prefer seeing because you feel more comfortable. You are an evening rather morning type and are rarely bored and generally happy on your own. You are not necessarily shy though some think you are.

You are intellectual, curious, creative and cultured. You probably enjoy art in all its forms and have a preference for non-conventional things. You are open-minded and enjoy trying new things. You tend to be tolerant and to have liberal attitudes. You have a “hungry mind” and enjoy reading to find out about the world, which you see as a fascinating and complex place. You have a vivid imagination and day-dream easily. Sometimes you find it hard to keep your feet on the ground. You have a creative personality.

You are tough-minded, straight-talking, and can be somewhat unfriendly. You are certainly quite confrontational and have no trouble disagreeing with people. You enjoy discussion and like winning arguments. You tend to be competitive. You are also not easily moved by other’s problems unless they are very close to you. Diplomacy is not your thing: If you don’t like something or someone, it is hard for you to pretend otherwise. You believe in saying exactly how you see things.

You are proactive, responsible, and self-motivated. People know you are reliable and dependable. You strive for excellence and are driven by status, goals and target. You are generally focused on your goals and willing to work hard to attain them. You are well-organized and work efficiently. You are methodical and prefer to always plan ahead. You don’t like leaving things till the last minute and are self-critical if you do not achieve your goals. You prefer to avoid risks. You have a reputation both for your work ethic and for being conscientious.